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November 25, 2017

braces

Palms Springs White Party

COCK RING CIRCUS

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I went to Palm Springs for this year’s White Party weekend for the 25th Anniversary celebration.  I interviewed actor, singer and TV producer Jai Rodriguez for the White Party issue of The Fight magazine and I wrote an article about my first White Party experience, back when I was a kid. SOOooo when the editor

OPEN WIDE!!!

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We’ll call her Lorena.  In her Hey Day, she was a one of those show queens at Plaza–that ghetto fab dive bar that features Mexican vaudeville drag acts lip synching to Spanish hits on La Brea Boulevard (the real fun is watching these non-English speaking divas lip synch to English hits; their lips move, but

SNAP THAT!!!

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So here’s something not too many people know about me:  I possess the secret power of a very loud snap–meaning I can snap my fingers very loudly and I can do that shit consecutively.   Others posses the gift of a loudish snap, but I’ve yet to meet someone who can snap louder than yours

THE BRACE FACE DIET

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  Get a boyfriend and the chances of getting a pooch in the midsection are very likely (and I’m not talking about a furry, four-legged K-9 friend on your belly either, although we do have one of those also who loves to take naps on and around the gunt area).  Of course, I still workout,

THE 40-YEAR-OLD BRACE FACE

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  I have to brace myself.  I got braces the other day.  They hurt like a mutherfucker and I feel like the exact opposite of anything remotely cute.   The only consolation to the pain and aesthetic torture is that there is light at the end of the of the metal tracks with a promise

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